Emily’s story

Unlike my first pregnancy, which I couldn’t wait to immediately share with the world, we kept the news a secret for months the second time around.  Looking back, I think I had a gut feeling right from the start things were a bit different this time. Our 12-week scan showed that Willow was growing as expected, but the screening tests indicated I was high risk for Down’s, Edwards’ and Patau’s syndrome. We opted to have further NIPT blood tests and to our relief the results came back low risk. The only concern was that my PAPP-A (pregnancy associated plasma protein) bloods had come back low, which can be associated with pre-eclampsia and intrauterine growth restriction (IUGR). I was told this is fairly common, prescribed a low dose of daily aspirin to help the blood flow to the placenta and advised we would have regular scans to keep an eye on Willow’s growth.

Our 20-week scan was on 14.11.23. I’d been on a night shift so Tom picked me up from work and we grabbed a coffee before going to the hospital. I felt excited and relieved to have finally reached this milestone in the pregnancy. We had decided not to find out our baby’s gender this time although had considered how exciting it would be to reveal it to everyone over Christmas if we changed our minds. The sonographer asked if I’d felt much movement. I hadn’t at this stage but wasn’t overly concerned because I had an anterior placenta. Initially, the sonographer was quite chatty but there was a noticeable change in the atmosphere as time went on. She later informed us that she was seriously concerned about the growth of our baby and would be referring us to fetal medicine for more thorough investigations.

We had an urgent scan on 18.11.23 where the consultant confirmed that Willow had severe IUGR. We were informed there was a small chance Willow would make it full term, and that if she did, there was a strong possibility there would be complications at birth as well as long term health implications that could affect her quality of life. The scan also found multiple hematomas on the placenta. This, coupled with my history of high blood pressure later in pregnancy put me at high risk of developing pre-eclampsia.

Due to these being such serious concerns, we were given the option of TFMR. This was an incredibly difficult and complex situation we found ourselves in and it was during this time I came across ARC. The information, resources and stories shared on their website were a huge source of support and made me feel less alone during this incredibly difficult time. Ultimately, we made our decision based on the expert information we had been given and within the best interests of our baby and our family.

I was admitted to hospital a few days later to start the induction process. We packed our hospital bags the night before, just like we had done 14 months ago for Pippa’s arrival, but this time knowing that our baby wouldn’t be coming home with us.  We spent most of our time on the bereavement ward, surrounded by an incredible team of midwives and maternity support workers, and Tom was able to stay the whole time. However due to my blood loss, I had to deliver Willow on the labour ward where doctors were on hand 24/7. After a lengthy induction process and 7 hours of labour, Willow finally arrived at 5:34am on 27.11.23. We are so thankful we were able to spend some precious time with Willow over the next few days and we will cherish those memories forever.