Like so many others our contact with ARC began after the 12 week scan and the devastating news that there was a problem with our baby. It was our first pregnancy and a much longed for and planned for baby.  After repeated scans, referral to the regional foetal medicine centre, and a CVS, I rang ARC to help understand what it all meant. They listened and helped me seek the information needed to make an informed choice. We made the decision no parent ever wants to face that of a TFMR. We were well cared for by our local hospital but the grief was devastating and I took comfort from the stories written by other parents in the ARC newsletter; just knowing that others had experienced similar things or felt like I did was a great support in such dark times.  

When just over a year later we welcomed a healthy baby boy into our lives it felt the most natural thing to want to give back to ARC and support others  who were equally struggling. Three years after losing our first baby I contacted ARC again to find out how I could help others who were facing a similar experience. I attended a training day with Jane and others and embarked on my journey as a support network volunteer. Over the last twenty years I have had the privilege of speaking with many parents who have faced the challenge of making decisions regarding TFMR.  

Being available to listen, share experiences and provide support in a confidential and caring way is the great strength of the parent support network. Knowing you are not alone in what you are going through was a comfort to me and hopefully is to others too. Finding a connection with a parent who is grieving, to help them in their journey, is the act of kindness we can offer to each other. Sometimes that is a text or email or phone call and with others that may be a longer relationship of support. There is always great joy when sometime later you hear that they have welcomed a healthy baby in their lives.