Volunteering on the ARC Helpline is my way of giving something back.

I found ARC a few weeks after having a termination for Down’s in the summer of 2009.  

I suffered periods of anger, anxiety, and depression for a few years after my termination, and whilst I carried on working and being a mum to my two boys, it really was life changing. It’s a lot to carry around and at some point, I decided that it didn’t all have to be negative and there must be some good to come from it all.  

I considered how I could help others in the same situation, as part of my own healing process. I got support from ARC to become a volunteer on the Helpline. However, I soon realised that I wasn’t ready. A couple of years later, I tried again. My life was too chaotic with young children and a full-time job, and I didn’t want to let anyone down, so again I put it on hold. ARC were eternally supportive and patient. Eventually in 2020, I knew I was settled and healed. I’ve been supporting ARC mums on the phone ever since. I’m not a trained counsellor but am there to listen and empathise. I speak to a few mums every month.  

I talk to mums who have had terminations a matter of weeks ago, or sometimes much longer ago. We all process and heal differently and there is no right or wrong pattern or solution. I hope mum’s feel they can say anything in confidence and I won’t be shocked, no matter how personal or sensitive. I’m just there to listen and empathise.  

I only speak to mums who have had a TFMR for Down’s Syndrome, because this is what I know and what I can relate to. Termination for Down’s is a controversial topic and often the guilt and social pressure is hard to work through – there are not many channels to go to for help with this specific issue. I know how that feels and think it’s vital that ARC is there to help. I feel privileged that women trust me with their stories, their emotions, and fears. Volunteering for ARC is one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done, and I hope to continue to do it for as long as I’m needed.