My names Emily and I had to have a termination for medical reasons. I named my baby Frankie.
I was in Australia travelling and seeing family when I found out I was pregnant, and was shocked but so excited. I had my first scan a week after I returned, and I saw my baby for the first time, kicking his/her little legs and a very strong heartbeat.
The midwife then advised we go for a fetal medicine scan as it showed a skull abnormality. Just hours later I got a call to confirm it and two days later I was in another hospital and having my fetal medicine scan.
After a long look at the scans the doctor and midwife asked if I wanted to see my baby and of course, I said yes. Seeing my baby’s little legs kicking and a strong heartbeat was magical. And then the doctor turned the screen away and I was up and sat on a chair and as he explained that the baby had Anencephaly. I had researched what conditions my baby might have after the first scan and had read a lot on this condition so knew that this was the worst-case scenario.
I was in shock and don’t remember a lot of what they said. Then we were taken to a small room where we could process the news in private.
After a few days the tough decision to have a termination for medical reasons was agreed upon as we didn’t want the baby to be in pain, or ourselves, any more than what we already were. We could have waited and hoped the baby would survive to term and even birth, but our baby’s case of Anencephaly was severe and nothing would change the outcome. Our baby would eventually pass either before, during or soon after birth.
The midwifes and doctors where all amazing at the hospital where I had my medical termination, but it has been the hardest decision of my life. I am forever changed and will always remember my baby Frankie, who I never got to hold in my arms, just in my heart.